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Sunday, December 24, 2006

Dead Sea Monkeys

So I recently reprised my role as "booth bitch" for the Dead Sea Pavilion working for a week at the Columbus Circle street fair. I have worked a lot of street fairs and I have seen a lot of crazies. I have gone loopy and come back again, only to find I am still loopy, but often not as loopy as those that visit the booth. I can't even recall all of them, and that makes me sad since they definitely thrust me into a pseudo reality wondering if I was in some strange dream as they spout out unintelligible gibberish with behavior only seen on SNL, Mad TV, and In Living Color. People say strange things, and do even weirder things, such as accepting a free Q-tip we were offering just to be silly and walking away staring at it with a gleam in their eye as though they had just won the lottery. My favorite thing ever uttered in the booth happened this past week when a pretty normal looking woman came in and was interested in the face cream with the Dead Sea Minerals in it, but what she said was... "Umm...hi! Do you have any of those face creams with the dead sea...monkeys....or whatever?" Instantly I smiled, as I always seem to when monkeys are involved. Then the brilliance exploded when I realized there is such a thing as Sea Monkeys...and she was not only requesting Dead Sea Monkeys, but in a face cream! I immediately got visuals of microscopic sea monkey cadavers rubbed all over her face. I started cracking up, and she looked at me like I was insane. She thought I was insane for laughing at her having asked for face cream with dead sea monkeys in it. A last she walked away wondering what was wrong with me. What's most wrong is that I didn't tell her that the dead sea monkeys cost extra.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Funky Spam Subjects

I'd like to share with you the bizarre subjects of the spam I have been receiving lately in my yahoo account. They perplex and amuse me. I spend at least a few seconds wondering not only what the purpose of spam is, but then...how and where "they" (whoever "they" are) could pair up such random words and why....I have been collecting my favorites and thought I would share them with you. Perhaps they will inspire you in some way.

Sketchy Bohemian
Correspondingly Absent-mindedness
Obtrusive Shiver
Not waggle no yachtsman
All of us havestrayed away like sheep.
He rod a canny
convalescent prohibitively
Have unicorn the vicksburg