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Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Here Comes the Sun

  You all know the story.  Girl visits NYC and it's love at first sight.  All she wants is to move to NYC and perform on Broadway.  She just hopes that New York will take her in and be kind.  Well, okay - anyone who saw my cabaret knows that isn't exactly what I had expected.  I knew it would be really difficult - but hell if that didn't excite me even more!  The first time I set foot in NYC a pigeon shit on my head but I didn't care.  I expected it.  So I moved here and started my NYC romance.  Like every exhilarating love affair - I found passion, inspiration, & creativity with just the right amount of hurdles and pigeon shit laced throughout to keep it a constant challenge/chance for growth.  New York forced me to evolve in ways I never dreamed I would and learn exactly what I'm made of.  Though I knew my dream of Broadway would be difficult - I feel a little silly now saying that somehow - deep inside - I never doubted it would happen.  Here I sit - nearly 11 years later and well, let's just say that dream feels 100% as challenging as it did the day that pigeon shit on my head.  People often would ask me in those first few years whether I was thinking about giving L.A. a try - or did I miss Pittsburgh?  My mom, of course, knew me best and could tell within that first year or so that I wasn't coming home - that NYC was going to be my home for a very long time.  She saw my love for the city and continues - to this day - to support me fully in my pursuit of my dreams here.  All I have ever wanted, that I just knew was in my grasp if I did the work, was living in NYC and performing.  That was one thing I was sure of.

  One thing I've never been sure of is whether or not I'd ever find someone to share my life with.  Of course I grew up expecting that "someday I'll meet someone" - because that is just what is supposed to happen - but as I grew older it really felt like that part of my life might never be like it's "supposed" to happen - and I honestly started to just accept this.  I knew I was likely going to live in NYC for the rest of my life and would most certainly be that crazy lady on the train with weird glasses wearing leopard pajama pants and talking to herself.  And that was okay by me.  My, how life can through you for a loop sometimes! Without getting too crazy into the nitty or the gritty -- the important part here is that I did meet someone.  And that someone loves me.  And I am crazy about that someone.  And that someone lives out in New Jersey.  So....guess who's moving to Jersey?  That's right - it's ME!  I know - I am as stunned as you are - which is the point of this post.  It wasn't an easy decision and again - neither the gritty nor the nitty is necessary here but....the EXCITING thing is - I am so giddy to begin my life with this guy without all the commuting!!!  The thing I haven't been as excited about is leaving my NYC.  That is the tough part.  There are so many things I am frightened of as I prepare to make my commute to my city-life sightly more difficult.

  So there I am - the day before I am to move 98% of my belongings from Queens to Jersey --- and I hop on the subway to meet my Jersey boy in the city for a "Final Saturday as an Official New Yorker" dinner type thing.  I am a little melancholy - as I have been with all my recent NY activities - when I hear an accordion player step onto my subway car and start playing/singing "Here Comes the Sun" by The Beatles.  Now - if you live in the city - you know there are a cast of familiar characters you see on your trains -- every once in a while there is someone new - but generally it's the same folks with the same old schtick.  Well, I have never seen this dude and I have rarely - if ever - heard any of them playing this song.  More importantly - this is one of the FEW songs my Jersey boy sang lead on in his old band.  I couldn't help myself as a smile spread from ear to ear and I heard the comforting words "It's all right.".  I begin to get out a dollar for this guy (which I try to do when they genuinely make me laugh/smile).  He had stopped playing and collected from someone else - but was on his way over to me.  My head was down as I struggled in my pocket when suddenly he is hovering over me and loudly singing directly at me "SUN SUN SUN - HERE IT COMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUN SUN SUN - HERE IT COMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  I gasped and giggled as he stopped and apologized for scaring me.  I gave him my buck and then he remained there - playing some romantic tune you'd hear if you and your love were being serenaded by an accordion at a little Italian restaurant.  But I was all alone.  It was perfectly ridiculous.  All of it.  It was one of my favorite types of NYC moments - I hadn't had one like that in a while.  And it came just when I needed it.  It felt like my "old flame" NYC was giving the thumbs up to this move with it's blessings - reminding me that it will always be right here and that I will always be just as much a part of it.  Only now it would be my (slightly) long-distance commute.

So that girl moves to New Jersey.  And it's all right....


PaulBlog1 said...

Glad you found someone to share your life with. The musician on the subway was priceless and made you feel much better about making a major life change. I hope things worked out well for all concerned.

JM said...

Thank you so much again PaulBlog1!!! Yes - this was definitely an important message for me to have received exactly when I did. And I have been living out here away from my city for over a year now. I am happy to say that MANY wonderful new and exciting advancements have been made BECAUSE I moved. It hasn't always been easy and I desperately miss NYC - but I know I am exactly where I need to be right now.